THE STORY OF THE ISIS

[steve]

THE STORY OF THE ISIS

First posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008

There was a young wife from the shire,
She required a gift for her sire,
Around all the shops she did trail,
Alas to no avail.

Not really knowing for what she did look,
Her friend advised her to search in a book,
Three shiny large catalogues later,
She figured her friend was really a traitor.

To the internet her fingers did wander,
For days and nights she did ponder,
Searching through Lycos and Google dot com,
Where would this Christmas gift come from?

Up came a page called gadget shop,
With a round shiny puzzle at the top,
She signed up to become a member,
Hoping her gift would arrive before December.

One hundred pounds she did spend,
Which the credit card would happily lend,
The postman delivered it a few days later,
Immediately she wrapped it in Christmas paper.

Finally when Christmas day came around,
There was three inches of snow on the ground,
She was worried about the gift, for which she had looked,
Would hubby like it? Or prefer what had just been cooked.

Time to open the gifts under the tree,
The rest of the family unwrap with glee,
The puzzle to her husband she did hand,
Hoping he liked it as she had planned.

Unwrapping her own she had a handful of rocks,
Across the room he studied the Isis puzzle box,
Inside the cardboard a beautiful case made of wood,
By pressing the button, pop open it could.

The button opened the case all right,
Revealing an orb all shiny and bright,
So in his hand he did hold,
The heavy sphere made of gold.

The next gift the wife did open was a Nintendo DS lite,
Still she hoped his Isis puzzle wasn’t a pile of shite,
To study his gift he was not able,
For Christmas dinner was on the table.

Boxing Day had come and gone,
Visitors prevented him from puzzling long,
The very next day he had the time,
To read the forum line by line.

From the official site he did read,
Ten clues must come down the broadband lead,
The file was in an Adobe format,
Quickly he transferred them just like that.

The clues where encrypted and couldn’t be read,
He just looked and scratched his head,
Then he discovered you could buy a cypher,
One per clue, the price was a fiver.

The clues were solved in no time at all,
He didn’t know how they helped open the ball,
Then he remembered about a thread,
The eleventh clue Puzz had said.

The last clue was easy to read,
This he did at great speed,
The dominant theory for the creation of the universe,
Was this a clue, or was it a curse?

For a while he did rotate and twist,
Until he nearly broke his wrist,
On top is a button which moved with a push,
Delicately decorated with an Isis cartouche.

Thirty minutes later his Isis did open,
On looking inside, there was no token,
Even though he had dropped the metal,
Everything looked to be in fine fettle.

A ten digit number was inside the lid,
Register it with SW he immediately did,
To Anash27 a photo was sent,
He wanted to join the club five per cent.

So once permission was all agreed,
The five per cent forums he could read,
There he found information,
From people in every nation.

He joined the club just in time,
To include Karen G in this rhyme,
This patient millennium diva,
Loves to help folk with Isis fever.

Next, to solve a pyramid riddle,
With his brain these did fiddle,
To gain a gold coin he needs a password,
But these clues are really absurd.

A gold coin is just for greed,
But a location he also does need,
A silver coin would do just nice,
Although gold does fetch a better price.

The number of weeks is nearly three,
And SonicWarp still haven’t sent a key,
If they are as busy as they say,
How come he got a sticker in a day?

The sticker in his car is for others eyes,
If spotted he wins a fifty quid prize,
The closest pyramid is near Glasgow,
But until a key comes he won’t know.

I must apologize for the length of this thread,
The story of his Isis had to be said,
Dr Iguana inspired me to write,
These twenty five verses of total shite.

First posted: Thu Jan 17, 2008

Twenty days after he had placed his claim,
Again no key, when the postman came,
Later that day came a knock at the door,
A neighbor complained about what was on his floor,

A letter addressed to eight, not five he did produce,
The name was right, was the postman’s brain loose?
The letter was white and quite a weight,
It was the key for which he did wait.

So to his computer he did go,
He clicked until the forum did show,
On his keyboard he did stream,
A verse to thank the SonicWarp team,

The key itself is intricate indeed,
To open a pyramid, it’s what you need,
The number etched inside his Isis lid,
Matched the engraving on the key it did.

The key with moving parts and all,
Is more complex than inside the ball,
From the key he could see,
How complicated the lock must be.

So now the adventure can really begin
To find a pyramid that has gold within,
Will it be on the British mainland?
Or maybe a country with a lot more sand.

Thirty two verses have now been written,
With the Isis adventure he is smitten,
So off to find a pyramid location,
With a couple of days on vacation.

First posted: Tue Jan 22, 2008

A few days away from home,
Nearly a thousand miles he did roam,
The old full pyramid was the first stop,
But it was not gold he took from the shop.

At the password, he took a guess,
His attempt was really a mess,
So the key stayed out of the lock,
Instead he had a chat with the Doc.

The pyramid keeper was very pleasant,
From her shop, he bought a present,
The present was to keep his wife sweet,
Now she can’t moan about his new treat.

He bought himself a brand new bA1l,
It could be the rarest of them all,
It is silver and pink with no extra engraving,
To open it up, he is craving.

Leaving the shop with no coin to hold,
He headed off to the jelly mould,
There he knew the gold was away,
So a silver coin was his today.

The next thing he needs to do,
Is open the new puzzle without a clue,
The method used to open the first,
Doesn’t make the second one burst.

After thirty nine verses of total drivel,
He will be looking at another riddle,
This time with a very select few,
Who also don’t seem to have a clue.

Since this is the first poem I’ve penned,
It would be nice to see it start a trend,
I won’t have many verses to do,
Until the advent, of Isis two.

First posted: Tue June 15, 2008

Nearly six whole months have gone away,
And with words, he did not play,
In the last verse you were warned,
As he picks up his pen, like a woman scorned.

All day he searched the SW webshop,
For the button he wanted to pop,
At half past four he stopped for his dinner,
A few minutes later barumjeffries was the first winner.

The ordering of what he did desire,
Was a shiny pyramid to admire,
At ordering his puzzle, he was twelfth,
It did of course, affect his wealth.

The shape is the only thing that he does know,
A fully finished item has failed to show,
Sometime in august is the launch date,
Until then he must just wait.

The prototype he happened to see,
As he waited in line for a pee,
The puzzle was at the O2,
In a glass case for all to view.

The exhibition was in the bubble,
The very long queues were the only trouble,
Inside could be seen artifacts from the boy king,
Very finely detailed and all covered in bling.

His London visit was for a few days,
He wondered how people could live in this maze,
The hustle and bustle of the city life,
Isn’t for him, or for his wife.

On the way home they called at Silverdale,
And got a good deal in Angela’s sale,
For one silver coin was his wife’s to be,
After Hanna had found the password, on kids TV.

Whilst waiting for the Isis 2 to arrive
There are plenty more passwords to derive,
He should be studying the pyramid map,
Instead of writing total crap.

[LouIsis]

A beautiful poem by Steve it still is,
but one or two verses I must say I miss,
where is the part that needs to be told,
of the man with 5 IsisBalls claiming his gold?

[steve]

It is true, because as yet,
The man from the shire still has gold to get,
Now, LouIsis has sussed that out,
Believe me, if gold he wins, he will shout.

[cornettracing80]

i wondered where they got
the weird and marandering plot
then it hit me ,how they did it
many many many a bong hit
wish i was there ,but present i am not.

[steve]

This room does not have rules as such,
If you reply you don't have to say much,
But if you do decide to take the time,
It is really nice that they all rhyme.

[Dr Iguana]

Don't waste time waxing lyrical
on matters pyramidical
Just get on with the passwords
(You'll need a bloody miracle)


or (with apologies to Mr W. and the K.)

I'm burning my brains at the keyboard.
I'm setting my cortex alight
to turn Keywolf into a password
and outdo hyaloclastite.

[steve]

Hi there Doc, it’s good to see you here,
I'm really glad you didn't disappear,
Because you said you might,
After Hanna found the Korodite.

From Necronomicon to Sevastopol,
The clues are there to find them all,
Some of them just sound ridiculous,
for example, Honorificabilitudinitatibus.

[Dr Iguana]

Sorry, you are wrong.
Think sadly, success is now
half a week away.